Self-Expression

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Our self-expression is meant to be a manifestation of the silence of our hearts.”
–Matthew Fox

I’m the type of person who rarely gets angry, at a situation or someone. So when I do get angry that means I’ve stretched out my patience and understanding and just couldn’t give any more than I had because if I do that, I would then lose my self-respect.

Late last year someone who I respect, trust and care for really pushed me to my limit. This person has a tendency to shut down when you confront them because they don’t want to hear what they had done and how it made you feel. This person made me feel as if I have no right to voice out my feelings at all…but I did anyway and it felt good! Still I felt like I wasn’t heard and was mostly ignored so I decided to write down what I wanted to say to this person. So here it goes…..

“I may look calm, cool and collected most of the time but I also have a flame inside that burns deep when set on fire. I am very patient, kind and understanding but never use that against me to try to manipulate me in any way because if you try, it might seem that I’m allowing you to do that to me initially but you can count on it that I’m observing your every move, your every word and calculating your intention until the right time comes that I let it all out and give you a piece of my mind. When that time comes, you’ve lost my respect and I’m done…all ready to walk out. When hurt I’m usually quiet at first, which means I’m giving you a chance to own up to what you did, recognize your fault and apologize; but if you keep repeating what offends me and I feel violated over and over again, don’t ever get upset when I open my mouth and my words cut like a knife and you feel that you are being insulted. I only say the truth and my words are not meant for insulting but rather to make you realize your fault in hopes that you would own up to your irresponsible actions.”

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