GRATEFUL <3

It’s past 3AM and I’m still wide awake, perhaps it’s from eating dinner super late and still feeling high and overjoyed by the heartwarming birthday wishes from friends and family from a few days ago. I am grateful beyond words for all of them for their time and effort. I feel truly blessed for they all made me feel loved on my special day and to think that just a day before then I was feeling a bit melancholy because I was missing my grandmother. See, my Grandma and I celebrated so many birthdays together as our birthdays are just a few days apart. Since her passing every birthday has been bittersweet for me as I can’t help but think that she’s gone. She always made my birthdays so special when I was growing up. I am forever grateful for all the time and effort she put into everything just to make sure that my birthday celebration was a wonderful one. She surely knows how to make me feel loved and cared for…something that I miss so much about my grandmother. ❤

I never get tired of talking about her and my grandfather. I have so many beautiful memories growing up because of them and I’m glad that my husband never gets tired of listening to my stories about my childhood. He hasn’t complained one bit so I’m assuming that he enjoys listening to it. Hahahaha! 😀

When my grandmother passed away two years ago, I felt a huge void in my life. I was depressed, lost and lonely. I pretty much kept to myself for a while because I found it hard to talk about my feelings at the time even to my husband. I cried myself to sleep at night and cried in the bathroom silently. It took a while before I felt okay with everything. Writing became my refuge because it allowed me to grieve and heal at the same time. Looking at old photos and reading old letters also helped as it reminded me of the precious moments I had not just with my grandmother but also with my grandfather. My favorite and most special birthday message from my grandparents was the one from my 18th birthday. I watched the video feed multiple times where my cousin read my grandparents’ birthday wish for me. I am so moved and humbled by their love and sacrifices for me. I may not be fortunate enough to grow up with both parents by my side but my heart is overflowing with gratitude because God surely blessed me with the MOST loving and caring grandparents anyone could ever ask for. ❤

 

 

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